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My Birthday Message

06/28/08

Permalink 08:34:21 pm, by eleanor Email , 644 words   English (US) latin1
Categories: my life, Thoughts

My Birthday Message

When I woke up this morning I felt confused. Somehow there seemed to be something I should have remembered or known. I think I had a dream last night. But there was my husband wishing me Happy Birthday with boxes of goodies.

After a few sips of my coffee I started to open the packages. My presents were lovely and thoughtful. But, I was really down, tired and depressed like I was when I went to bed last night.

P6180002So after a few morning exercises I went into my bathroom to take my shower. As I was brushing my teeth I looked up to my shelves and there was my green glass fairy perched haughtily on the shelf. Suddenly the dream that I had last night came back to me.

I dreamt that I woke up and there was that fairy sitting on a box on my bed. She wished me a happy 73rd birthday. Stunned I asked her what was in the box? She smiled and said: “Guess.”

This must be a dream, I remembered thinking, so I might as well go for it! “A magic drug to cure me of MS?”

“And what would you be doing with this new body at 73?” She sarcastically replied.

“Oh, that’s easy I’d be playing tennis with my husband, biking, climbing mountains again, and going out visiting people and places everywhere every day.”

She smiled again and responded, “I’m afraid not because that would not be possible.”

“Then should I just guess again?” I replied.

“If you want you can or you can just open it.” she said.

I thought for a while then I responded, “Maybe it has a magic potion to take away my wrinkles, and pump up my lips a bit … actually a whole facial uplift. And while we’re at it how about a little trimming of my increased waistline and putting the extra fat on my bum!”

Again she replied, “I can’t do that either.”

Frustrated I said, “Then why are you bringing me this box?”

“Maybe it’s time to just open the box,” she said.

“Okay,” I replied with a big sigh.

Bringing the box closer to myself I lifted it and tried to shake it like I’ve always done with presents. It kept getting heavier and heavier and I had to drop it. Now, I really didn’t want to open the box! I wanted to wake up from this dream that was getting scary. But the fairy and the box were still there.

Then, very sweetly, the fairy said, “I know you’re frightened, so I’ll tell you what’s in the box. This is your box of sorrows.”

Puzzled I asked her, “Why are you bringing me a box of my sorrows?”

She replied, “Because I could feel your unhappiness with your body and all on your birthday. And you have been so good at filling this box. Sometimes it took time but you always did put your sorrows behind you into this box eventually. That has helped to make you strong.”

Now I wanted and needed to look into the box. And there were all the unhappy moments and disappointments in my life, including the deaths of my parents and two of my brothers and my sister. And I could remember the feelings I had at the time. So I looked up at the fairy quizzically and asked, “Why, why are you showing me this?”

“It’s to help you put things into perspective to help you move on.” Then I woke up.

I didn’t remember my dream until I saw my green fairy on the shelf in the bathroom. I guess I’ll always remember the message that she was trying to send to me. I just need to go into my bathroom and look up.  

                                                                                                                      ellie         

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1 comment

Comment from: Pam S. [Visitor]
Pam S.Ellie...I was so touched by your birhtday post. I love the idea of putting your sorrows aside...tucking them away, not to be forgotton but simply to be put away. I hope your birthday was a happy one. You bring much joy to others.
07/19/08 @ 14:32

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