ELLIE'S BLOG on Living Well with MS

It's so easy to be upbeat and happy about life when everything is going great. Today with all the things in this changing world that are so uncertain and frightening we all feel extra stress. And uncertainty and change are definitely the biggest stressors of all.  This is the time when many will have to find new ways to cope, new ways to look at the world, and new ways to look at their own world.

We who have multiple sclerosis are well accustomed to change and uncertainty producing stress and have had to learn to cope. We are aware daily that we do not have total control over what effect MS will have on our day. We take meds, we rest, we avoid heat, but it's always there showing its head differently each day.    And let's face it we do not know what our future will be like either because of MS. 

But eventually those of us with MS  find a  coping mechanism. I admit some mechanisms are healthier than others.  But most of us move through denial, anger and then a healthy admittance and adapt to our situation.  However with MS this usually happens over and over again. We have an exacerbation than we go into a remission. Or we don't get better and slowly keep losing function. With each turn of events  we have to learn to adapt differently.  It certainly isn't always easy both emotionally and physically for us and for our family too. But after a while most of us learn that if you want to be happy (and I think everybody does ) we each have to find our own way to do this. 

I read a great article the other day. The title was "The key to happiness is living in the micro moment".  The thesis was that people who appreciate the small moments of happiness, laughter and joy through the course of each day tend to be happy people who are more likely to be resilient against adversity and more successful in jobs relationships and health outcomes .  This conclusion was reached by researchers at the University of North Carolina after they did a series of studies that required 86 participants to submit to daily emotion reports and that gauged their emotional status in detail over the course of the day. To read more go to the following link to the article in the L.a. Times. http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/booster_shots/2009/07/happiness.html?wpisrc=newsletter 

When I read this I was in a bit of a funk and it really hit home. I have been in a wonderful remission for six months now. I went from being mostly a wheelchair user to now walking short distances with walker, cane or wall. I was able to do so much more and was less tired.  But lately I have been feeling more tired and having more difficulty walking and I am so afraid that I'm going to start losing it. I did see my Neuro and he felt that I was doing fine and should keep doing the meds and maybe  I need to rest more."And see me in 3 months"

I came back from my MD  thinking about the article and acknowledging to myself the authenticity of what they were exposing. And I realized that it gave me a way out of my funk.

I have always used  things of pleasure like music, poetry ,reading a book or curling up to watch a favorite DVD to help me raise my mood and be more positive. But the article went beyond a planned activity to change mood. It was talking about things that are just happening around you and that if you take time to look or listen will just make you feel happy at the time.

For me these are things like watching the chickadee in my bird feeder skip in and out for their food, the baby robins' being fed by their mother in the nest in the eaves of the side porch or the beautiful butterfly in my butterfly garden flitting from blossom to blossom.

However , I don't think you should leave this just to chance.  There is no reason why you can't plan your environment so things that give you pleasure are more likely to happen.

I'll use my new garden for example.  If you've read my previous blogs you know that we had a major tree cutting down event which resulted in going from a too shady backyard to a desolate area that was distressing beyond words.  And I did not intend to leave it that way.  And we have not left it that way.  My family and I have worked our butts off to produce a backyard with  vegetable,herb and flower gardens. The beginning of a lovely backyard .

So now I have a back yard  that has great opportunities for the spontaneous pleasure I've been talking about.  Below is a picture of me sitting reading on my chaise on the shady area of the deck. I work in my garden and than rest, read a book and look and appreciate what we have created. The other day I was sitting here looking down at my birthday present of the Japanese Maple and the way we have restructured our ornamentals with the added blueberry bushes in a tiered section which leads down to a vegetable garden.  Suddenly a black capped chickadee flew onto the bottom branch of the Japanese Maple and hopped up to each of the branches as the sun shown through. Then it flew off to take a bath in the birdbath, shook its water off and flew to the top of the fence. The same day a beautiful yellow butterfly with black on the side of its wings flew from flower to flower on a lavender flowered hanging plant in the garden.

These events I had not planned but with my new garden environment they are most likely to happen. And they do give me much happiness that has helped my  mood for hours if not the whole day.

What are your happy times ? What have you done to help them to grow ?   Let me know!!  I plan to add more in other posts so maybe we can all give helpful suggestions to each other.  I believe in being happy!                                                     Ellie